How We Interpret Life

The Artisan Soul by Erwin McManus

Ch 3:  Interpretation:  Translation of Life

How we choose to interpret the events in our lives determines how we see the world.

Imagine wearing a pair of glasses.  As you look through the lens, think of a time when an experience, person or belief affected your view and interpretation of the world in a positive manner.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “God’s plans are to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

How would this change the way you interpret life if you embraced this truth about God?

p 72—“...truth is not nearly as powerful as interpretation...”

p 73—“...interpretation is more important than truth in that all truth, all human experience, every narrative and every story, in the end changes us only after we have engaged it and interpreted it through our own story.  Truth finds its way into the inner recesses of our soul only through interpretation...In the end, we decide which story becomes our story.”

How can 2 people have the exact same experience but interpret it in totally different ways?

“We are interpreters...We are translators of meaning, and thus everything we see, hear, smell, touch, taste, and experience is processed through all our previous experiences and perceptions...We see people through the filter of everyone we’ve ever know...we see circumstances through the filter of everything we’ve ever experienced...Every experience is interpreted by the overarching story of our lives, and those experiences give us greater clarity.”

“Art is an interpretation of life...it is the artist’s personal interpretation of their experience of life...an expression of our emotions...Through our lives, we paint a picture of what we believe and what we have experienced.”

As mommas, we parent in our own individual, unique way---because of our own story, belief and experience—and, the unique story of each of our children.  What 1 or 2 things are most important to you in being a momma?

The book describes two kinds of “uninteresting” people: the “watchers” who have never suffered, and the “wallowers” whose pain is their universe. 

p 77—“The first is the person who has never suffered...the other kind of uninteresting person..is the person who has suffered, and that suffering is all they know.”

Do you feel like you lean towards either side of this spectrum?  Why is it so important to suffer well?

Suffering well is going through the suffering with hope that life will get better, “this too shall pass”.  Jesus said He will never leave us or forsake us—from the day we’re created. 

When we remember sufferings from our past that continue to be painful memories, we can invite Jesus into that memory, and ask Him to show us where He was in that situation.  Since He is always with us, we can know that He was present and helping us in that exact situation.  Knowing this can set us free to move forward and leave that memory behind.  (Forgiving the one who wronged us will also set us free).

After our suffering, we can then encourage someone else who is going through the same experience we had.  This brings meaning and purpose into our suffering.

p 78—“Beyond despair there must always be hope; beyond betrayal there must be a story of forgiveness; beyond failure there must be a story of resilience...Only the Resurrection makes the Crucifixion what it is for all of us who are marked by the cross.”

p 81-82—“In finding our voice, we must pay careful attention to the interpretation of the story we are in.  As storytellers, we find meaning in all of life’s experiences and also bring meaning to the lives of others” (our children) “Our great fear is that we will never live a life worth sharing with others, never live a story worth telling, but that we will find ourselves trapped in a story for which there is no ending, only an endless cycle of disappointment and defeat.  The LIE that paralyzes us is that those failures and disappointments disqualify us from living out the great story of our lives.  The reality is that our struggles and suffering give us the context to tell the greatest story of our lives.”

How could your struggles or challenging chapters of your life help others?

Recognize the lies you are believing.  Name them, and reject them.  Then declare the truth.  Walk in the truth.

p 82—“...we are all essentially two selves—our experienced self and our remembered self...we choose between memories of experiences.”

p 83—“...our experiences are not the dominant force affecting our personal happiness.  It is instead our remembered self that controls how we perceive and experience life.”

“How we remember those experiences and even what experiences we choose to remember...have the most profound effect on our happiness.”

Do you know that you can “rewrite” your story?

p 84—“...I made a conscious decision to relinquish those” (negative) “memories as the material with which I defined my life.  I could not change my experiences—what happened, happened—but I could change my focus and my interpretation.  I began consciously REWRITING my personal history, determined to learn from my most negative experiences and use them as the material to develop my best self.  I also was determined to remember the best experiences ever given to me as a gift in my childhood.  I cannot understate the POWER of this process.  It not only changed how I remembered my childhood, but it changed me.”

”Be informed by your experiences but do not be controlled by them.”

We can alter our filter...the lens through which we see our experiences—past, present and future.

p 89—“When our interpretation of life is informed by the best of human emotions...love...hope...faith, it changes the way we see everything.”

There might be a glaring negative emotion and experience in your life.  Take time to look for the good in it.  Just as our heavenly Father only has prosperity, good, hope and a future for us (Jer 29:11), as mommas, we can look through the same filter, and see the good and beauty and wonder. 

It’s a happier day when we look for the good, rather than focus on the negative.

In fact, say it out loud.  “I love the way you _____.”  “I’m so glad you _______.  That was kind.”  Our children will receive this much better than negative words.  And, we will begin to see more and more of the good, rather than dread the negative.

Let’s choose to interpret the events in our lives and see the world in a positive manner!

The Voices We Listen To

The Artisan Soul (by Erwin McManus)

Chapter 2 -- Voice: The Narrative that Guides

THE VOICES WE LISTEN TO INFLUENCE OUR ABILITY TO TELL OUR OWN STORY

 

p. 39  “There is a stark difference between art and imitation....Even an authentic creative journey begins with imitation.  It’s how we learn everything.”

A child learns by imitation.  How have you seen your child imitate you?

p. 41  “...having our own voice, which is the point where we enter into the journey of the artisan soul....Before we speak for ourselves, others speak on our behalf.  Before we are able to declare who we are, our soul forms around the declarations of others telling us who we are....The soul is made of malleable material.  It forms itself around whatever material is informing it.  Unfortunately, the people who have the greatest influence in our lives rarely understand the power of their words to shape who we become.  They never fully understand that what informs us forms us.  Words spoken into a soul are like the hands of a potter pressed against wet clay.”

Who had the greatest voice/influence in your life?

Who has the greatest voice in your child’s life?

Be positive and specific.  Focus on words that portray your child’s skills and character.  “You are more responsible than that.  I know you can clean your room better than this.”  “You are so patient to wait for your sister to get out of the car so you can play in it next.”

Set aside “sacred time” (one-on-one) with your child.  It transforms them and you.

Positive words are powerful, especially after hard days.  Tell your child, “You did such a good job with .....”

Pray with kids.  It is a way of speaking into their hearts.  Talk with them about God.

p. 43  “To find our own voice, we must first wrestle with the voices inside our brains.”

What are your other voices?  Which voices are God’s, someone else’s, or yours?

Do you feel that the way you “mother” is an authentic expression?  Do you do your work the way you do it or the way someone else would do it?  What could you do to make your work more authentic?

Other moms can be judgmental and harsh.  Let it slide right off our shoulders, and not reach our heart.

It’s easy to compare ourselves to other moms...not a healthy perspective.  Someone always comes out on top, or bottom. 

Sometimes we deal with sleep deprivation and have a short fuse.

Enjoy 5 min of eye to eye time with your child. That fills their tank.

Have goals and expectations for each day, but not so high that we are disappointed if we don’t do everything we want.

Maintain a good perspective.  Be authentic with yourself.

Think of your “older self” and what you would say to yourself.

“All the voices that seek to make us small and irrelevant and worthless find power only when we have allowed them to become our voice.”

Who do you allow to speak into your life?  Are there any voices you need to change?

What’s a lie you’ve believed about yourself in the past? Or now?  Recognize and release that lie, and replace it with the truth.

What voices am I allowing my child to hear?

As moms, we feel alone sometimes, especially when our husband doesn’t understand all we do with the kids.  We want our husband to bear our burden with us.  But our husband wants us to bear his burden, too.

p. 45  “We also have to believe that there is a story we are supposed to be in, a story that is bigger than us and, because of that, a story that makes us bigger.”

Think of past and future generations.  We will impact the next generation, and even the next after that (as grandmothers).

p. 54  “Until the voice that guides us declares our freedom, nothing and no one in the world can make us free...What is the narrative that guides us?”

p. 55  (story of God creating Eve for Adam)  “I love how God meets a need that Adam had no language for.  It is a beautiful picture of the intimate concern of God.”

God knows our needs even before we do...and he provides for us.  He is with us, even in our loneliness.  He provides our physical, social, spiritual, emotional needs.

p. 63  “One of Picasso’s earliest memories is the internal narrative passed on to him by his mother...”

Think of football players on TV and how they say, “Hi, mom!”

Moms, you have a powerful voice in your child’s life.  It can be scary, but it can also be a great opportunity.

p. 64  “When we hear the voice of God or heed Jesus’ invitation to follow Him, it leads us out of captivity into freedom.  When we hear God’s voice, we finally find our voice...when we speak, our words have power.”

p. 65  “His (God’s) words spoken into existence alter humanity forever.”

God’s words make the difference in our lives, and in our child’s life.

p. 67  “Our story is what we have to offer the world.”

Creating the Future

"BECAUSE OF THE WAY GOD CREATED YOU TO CREATE, YOU ARE GOD’S HOPE FOR THE FUTURE"--The Artisan Soul, chapter 1

I'm hosting a book club with a book that my pastor (Erwin McManus) wrote, "The Artisan Soul".  I LOVE this book!  And I LOVE the women in our group.  We are a group of moms.  We discuss and wrestle with how this book relates to us and our children in day-to-day life.  I'm passing on our discussions to you, so you can benefit from our conversations.  

Chapter 1 is "Soul: The Essence of Art"  (words in italics below are quotes)

During this season of life, you are creating the future right in our own living room, kitchen, and bedroom.  Your children are the next generation.  They are the future!  Just like you, they are created by God uniquely and specifically, to create...to give to the world...to be artisans.

Moms, you are one of the most courageous people I know because you are creating the future by what you pour into your children.  Most moms I talk to are more aware of their own limitations than their potential, and doubt themselves more than believe in themselves.  Be courageous!  Live from your heart.  God chose you to be their mom.  You've got what it takes.

You are artisans as you intentionally get to know your child's personality, quirks, bents, desires and dreams--and embrace them just the way they are.  You're the only one who knows your child the way you do...what makes him/her tick.  Observe and take note of the strengths that you see in them, the things they are good at, what comes natural to them.  Tell them.  Help them accept and love who they are.

"There is an order to the creative process:  we dream, we risk, we create."  Dream outlandish dreams for your kids. Tell them the dreams you have for them (how they can do anything they set their mind to).  Ask them about their dreams.  Affirm them.  Who else will have these kinds of conversations with your kids?  And, experiment with them in moving towards seeing their dreams fulfilled.  Help them dream, risk and create.

"The most important works of art to which we will ever give ourselves are the lives we live....At first, our soul is like a canvas where others begin to paint the portrait of who we are.  Slowly, as we develop and mature, we take the brush into our own hands and continue painting our own lives.  Then we go beyond that, to leave our mark on the world around us."    What greater work of art can you create, than that of what you paint on the canvas of your own child?  You have the paintbrush right now.  It won't be long before your child takes the brush into his/her own hands and continues what you've begun.  Paint with flair!

 "Art at its purest form is an extension of the soul...the only art we can create is that which authentically reflects who we are."   You are one unique mom!  Nobody will mother like you---because of who you are, and who your child is.  Nurture that part of you--your essence--that makes you the great mom that you are.  And nurture your child's soul by affirming his/her uniquenesses.  Take time to connect with God in meaningful ways, and refresh your soul.   

 
A word of encouragement for you, Moms--
"To create is to be human.  To create is to fulfill our divine intention.  To create is to reflect the image of God.  To create is an act of worship."  Wow!  As you are "mommying", you are reflecting God, you are worshiping God, and fulfilling your purpose.  You go, girl!